Thursday, 16 May 2019

Day 9 - Welcome to Jurassic Cavo Doro


"We've used Dino DNA to create yet another Greek wonder........Welcome to Jurassic Cavo Doro"



Trust that stupid car to drive past, it was looking good up until then, bet you thought it was real didn't you?
Basically that's the entrance to the new part of Cavo Doro.

Well we're 9 days in and all is well. No different to any other season, same good start, mainly all inclusive holiday makers and mainly first timers to the island and resort so that's always good to have in the bar with a sprinkle of regulars.

Took a picture of when the bar was half finished, why i don't know, i guess cause it looks neat and tidy without any furniture. Couple of scatter cushions would improve this picture but not really viable what with dust, spilt drinks, cats, dogs, flying ants (whats up with flying ants, why do they lose their wings almost instantly, how stupid) and limbs that won't allow people to get up once they're on the scatter cushions. NOT A GOOD IDEA AT ALL.


My first frappe of the season. Should have gone somewhere that served it in a glass for the first picture instead of a plastic, not very environmentally friendly either, poor turtles.


My first Alpha Weiss at my Saturday night hang out after i close, this also includes my date night with Sian (via text when apart) while I'm sat sipping and chilling. Something to look forward to at the end of a busy night and week. No need to cook that night either as get free peanuts with my beer, ISN'T LIFE GREAT!



It is bloody freezing at night, so much so that on my bike on way home at about 2.30am my feet and shins are numb. Never had that before and in the morning its a hoody, long sleeve top and gloves while i'm out and about. The worst weather start to a season in my 19 years here, thank god i got the heater in the bar which has been on every night.

Now then, when i left last year i left a sign on the bar saying "Just popped out for milk, Back 1st of May". I think you'd agree that's quite a obvious sign for all to read. I told Angelina in the shop opposite when i left i had my flight booked for 1st May, i had booked it before I'd even left the island. I had e-mailed my bar landlord and told him i will be back 1st May. I had e-mailed Dennis in the shop next door and told him I'd be back 1st of May. I'd seen all the family in Puzzle next door and told them I'd be back the 1st May. My best friends Tasos and Demi knew i was coming back 1st May and i even posted my flight confirmation on this blog showing i was back 1st May.
So why is it when i turned up others in resort thought i wasn't coming back? 12 people in all in the resort knew i was coming back, there was a nice big printed sign on the empty bar saying when i was coming back, i posted it on this blog but people still insist on making their own stories up, WHY? 

I'm always asked questions on how i ended up on Zakynthos? Why here? How long have i been here?
Its only then i think about my business and my time here and i worked out that out of all the food and beverage places on the old road in Kalamaki I'm the longest standing business with 13 years. Other buildings have been there just as long but the businesses have changed, changed owners or changed names but i am the longest serving business, that's crazy.
Already this week i have been asked many times "When am i thinking of stopping with Oceanic?" , "Am i back next year?" As i say to everyone i always live one day at a time as you never know what may happen, why look so far ahead? I wake up and live for that day. I could become ill, the island could have a major earthquake and destroy the building of the bar, a family member may need my support in UK and need me to go back, who knows whats around the corner BUT I've been thinking about it due to people asking and have made a future decision due to my change in my personal life in the UK and 2020 will definitely be my last season and Oceanic will be up for sale. I will tell you how much just in case anyone interested and it's £10,000 exact, no offers, all in, which is dirt cheap considering how much i have actually put in to the business over the 14 years so its a bargain without a doubt and you'll have a ready made website, reviews and major internet profile presence. In fact i spent that amount out to set up Oceanic in my first season 2007. Also whoever takes it on you could also expand as the bar has a food licence. 
So there you go, that will now definitely stop all the gossip mongers as you heard it here first and i have told no one on the island so don't believe anything else you hear LOL.
Why am i telling you all so far in advance, well, it will take whoever that long to get their papers sorted for residence and tax, we all know how slow it is over here lol
Anyone who may be interested you can contact me through my contact page on the website:-


I feel now with the way I'm very happy in the UK that is where my life should be but not just yet.

I also said if a food franchise like McDonalds etc or a fish & chip shop opened in Kalamaki i would leave but that's not happened yet.

People may find this a bit of a shock but you wouldn't expect me to be here when I'm 60 would you? I'm realistic and that just wouldn't happen. 
I can holiday here instead and watch someone else run around after me lol.

So until this weather changes so i can take Kevin the Minion out........

Serve All. Love All, Peace All, Kevlar Out!


Thursday, 9 May 2019

Day 1 - I'm open!

Well what a miserable start to season 2019.

Firstly i was poorly sick, thanks for all the well wishes and get well soon, then the weather is the worst I've known for May in 19 years, overcast and chilly most days and freezing at night, good job i got the weather tents and heating.
The set up of the bar was quite painless this year, 3 days and all done, well almost, just got to paint the white part of roof and put new letters up then its finished.
The customers love the new look of the bar and i think its the most classy so far, its the bulbs that do it.

Everyone is saying that the resort is quieter this year so far (only 7 days in, JES!) but my first night was the same as all the others but there are more all inclusive rooms this year with more hotels giving up rooms to all inclusive instead of H B or B & B.
On the old road we now have Jurassic Park, when its a nice sunny day i will take a quick video of the entrance, it's got old Rexy behind the wooden doors or King Kong. Haven't ventured inside yet but as you know there are plenty of goats around if inside there is a petting pen for the dinosaur.

Not had a take away yet as still not 100% but god i can't wait to stuff my face with all the badness i can find and then flop on the sofa and collapsed in to a meat and tzatziki coma.

Lots of Dutch in the resort this year, not sure we'll be seeing any hash cake shops opening any time soon but there could be a opening for a orange clothing shop as every Dutch person i have met has had a piece of orange clothing.

Added the original Porn Star Martini to my menu this year, GOOD GRIEF, what an absolute pain in the arse. Douglas Ankrah who invited the drink must have had to much time on his hands, add this, shake that, float this, serve that. As you know i will only make a cocktail unless its to the original method and recipe, what a phaff and guess what i sold the most of so far.........yeah you guessed it.....bloody porn star martini. I can see that being the thorn in my side, the fly in my ointment, the shell in my egg mayo sandwich or the verruca plaster in a swimming pool, just a annoyance all round.

Will be stocking the Levante beers again this season from June but also i have Alpha Weiss which is a lovely beer, my favourite i think after drinking it all last season on my Saturday nights out.

No price changes you'll be glad to hear so that should keep you all happy and a few new cocktails to try, think i came up with another 5, can't remember now.

Can't wait till it gets warmer as this season I'm given myself more time during the day, not knocking myself  out rushing around the place getting stuff and doing favours, its all about me time, oh and me and Sian time while she's out here.

So Liverpool are in the champions league final and this year i will be closed on 1st June, didn't close last year for their final but this year i will be but just the one night, so if anyone wants to join me in Zakynthos town to watch it your more than welcome,

So there you go, a little update on the first couple of days but I'm hoping it will get warmer so i can get out and about and start Kevin the Minions adventures.

This year no food aid parcels are needed unless its black pudding, white pudding or muffins, i can now get crumpets and frosted shreddies on the island but if any food parcels do arrive i will be more than happy to accept it, of course food parcels will be reimbursed, never expect anything for nothing, cash or drinks will be exchanged LOL.

So until the next warmer update........

Serve All, Love All, Peace All, Kevlar Out!

Wednesday, 1 May 2019

I'm here! Rain and dark cloud, BUGGER!

An elderly couple once asked me "Do you like Pina Colada?",  i replied "No it reminds me of getting caught in the rain".

Little bit of bar humour there to kick of this first instalment of Season 2019.

Well i waved Sian tata for now (not long though), picked up my pack lunch and off i went to the airport.
The day before i was very ill, so ill i thought i wouldn't be able to fly, cold shivering, body boiling and aching from head to toe, would have been quite easy to miss flight BUT NO, i sucked it up and got on the coach feeling like i had been run over. Also i never take any tablets when i'm ill but i had to try something with this as never felt this way before so i reluctantly took 2 paracetamol.

Got to airport and its self check in. JESUS CHRIST! There were about 20 self check ins, guess how many assistant staff.........14, 14 bloody staff for a self check in.....they may as well be behind the counter checking in if they are being paid to be there, how ridiculous.
I leave the check in area and up to the security check, oh joy in front of me is a Welsh hen party of about 10, youngest being in 40's all with same t-shirts on saying such hilarious things as "Brides Bitch", "Python Handler", "Flora Spreadable"  and the most brilliant t-shirt ever, must have taken hours, put Dylan Thomas to shame " Ball Juggler". BRAVO, BRAVO, Noble Literature prize winner in the making there. So not only did i have a gaggle of women in front of me none of them must have flown before. It took forever as they had bottles and toiletries that were to big and ones they could take they hadn't put in to that little clear bag, freaking idiots.
In to the departures lounge and set up a little camp for myself so i could be away from the hordes and just spy.
Question, 2 weeks off for Easter for the children yes? So why was there so many children over 7 going on holiday? i saw so many.
On to plane a front seat already booked with speedy boarding, just how i like it. Tried to sleep most of the way but felt so rough it was hard to sleep comfortable.
I step off the plane and how wonderful to see big black clouds and rain.
First through and bag comes really quick.
Jump in to taxi but forget to buy water and baguette. YOU IDIOT PINNELL!
Get to our house and first thing i do is put battery on charge for bike, sweep through, unpack rucksack, make some gruel (Oats, god thank you for oats) as nothing else in house and collapse under quilt shivering and boiling writing this.
Lets hope tomorrow is a better day, well can't be any worse than Tues and Wed, i can't even go out to watch Liverpool and get supplies.

So just a quick little update as going to try to shift whatever it is i got.

Tomorrow we begin.

Serve All, Love All, Peace All, Kevlar Out!





Wednesday, 24 April 2019

It's a wonderful wonderful life!

Good morning trees, good morning birds, good morning sunshine, good morning grumpy dustbin man who woke me at 6am, isn't life wonderful.

Well my sky taxi is almost ready to fly to the rock. Its been 19 years this year of me being on Zakynthos running a business and 13 years with my own business Oceanic which i built up and worked alone since Oct 2006 as you all know.

Me and walking has been a regular thing for years, i don't even need a destination, i just walk. As long as i have my music with me i just roam. I think the longest non-stop walk i have been on was about 14 miles maybe a little more.

After walking one of my usual marathons along the beach singing loudly while dogs howl at my angelic tones i decided to stop off for a beer at a bar that is 28 storeys up at the top of a apartment block in Swansea which is called "Grape and Olive". When the suns out and its a clear sky the view is amazing.

My version of a selfie that i actually started taking like this in 1986, selfies aren't a new thing folks!


Part of Swansea's 4 mile beach.


Anyone for a dip. If you jump from this height feet first you'll be fine........honest!


Talking of heights, i have been doing my Bear Grylls thing again to get a little fitter ready for the season and decided hike up Craig Llanishen which is 271 metres high. That may not seem much but that's the height directly up from sea level to the top, the walk itself is a 21.9% gradient and 3km from bottom to top.
It wasn't that bad, i thought i was going to be panting and heart thumping out of my chest but it seems I'm allot fitter than i thought. I had a slight sweat on but that was it and that was a spur of the moment walk in jeans and flat trainers so i wasn't even dressed appropriately for such a adventure.
Sian has named me "The Rambling Rev" as before that climb i had already walked 8km in the sun but it was all worth it, the whole 14km (8.5 miles), 1/ For the view and 2/ For the pub at the bottom of the mountain when i came down.

The view out over Cardiff after i had combated the elements, thorn bushes and evil sheep.



So we are days away from returning and to be honest I'm pretty laid back about it, I'd be quite happy to stay in the UK now as loving life here.
Not going to stress over set up, got some nice new cocktails for you to try, added some old creations of mine which i had taken off the menu and the same as last season "if your not in by midnight then you've missed out" and every Saturday last order for drinks is midnight so i can have a little me time out in Zakynthos Town. That worked quite well over the past 2 years so going to stick with it.
Added a load of new but old songs which I've been getting together over the winter and i may move the bar to outside again, not sure yet though.

Trying to find paper straws but they are so expensive, i don't want to use plastic straws if possible, Bought new cocktail shakers for the shaker cocktails on table, buying some new glasses and rearranging the lighting and decor.
To be honest with you this winter the bar has been the furthest from my mind than ever before and have only started thinking it through this week which has been great.

I promise this year Kevin the Minion will go on some adventures and re-visit the mad axe man house to do battle or to find more victims, i hope neither as its me that has to take him there.

Now, i never mention Brexit BUT i don't really care about it and its been delayed so a few more months to be wasted even though they have had 3 years, the only good thing about the delay is Brits may now book to go abroad again which leads up until the end of season 2019.
No football this summer, thank god and the Rugby World cup starts Sept 20th just as the season is slowing down with the Semi Finals being the day after i close and the Final on Nov 2nd after I've got home, great schedule. Shame about the opening game Japan v Russia, not a great spectacle if I'm being honest.

Well, i got few things left to do here, people to see, arrangements to make, days out to have before i head back so i am going to enjoy every day i have left here in the UK with Sian, family and friends.

LETS GET THIS SEASON STARTED!

Sunshine here i come. Talking of sunshine........Extinction Rebellion........climate protesters.

I'm all for saving the planet, totally 100% that's why i want paper straws but......these protesters grind my gears.

1/ I bet 90% use petrol driven cars
2/ I bet 70% use public transport at some point
3/ I bet 100% use electric to watch themselves on TV
4/ All the rubbish they left behind of cups, wrappers and straws isn't environmentally friendly
5/ All had mobile phones which aren't environmentally friendly and what did they power them off.....goat crap and straw?

I rest my case.

So until i arrive back on the rock...............

Serve All, Love All, Peace All, Kevlar out!

Wednesday, 17 April 2019

The dream is over - It's now reality, DEVILS STAND PROUD!


We all dreamt one dream.......
United it became reality...........




This is hockey..............We are Cardiff Devils

Video created by Paul Sullivan

Monday, 1 April 2019

I'm disgusted....some people are so vile!

I can't believe there are such low, vile terrible people about, absolutely disgusting and need to be called out.

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?.........BEERS THAT TASTE LIKE GRAPEFRUIT!

Who are these sick individuals? Dear god man why would you? They need to be shot or paraded around the streets being whipped with birches until they apologies for being such lunatics. May as well serve me cyanide in a glass. YOU MONSTERS!

One of these beers is called "Cali American Pale Ale", AH, no wonder, bloody Americans, the land of the weird or is this their idea of a fruit in their diet to help with obesity as its got grapefruit in it?

This isn't the only one though, OH NO, there are more horrible yukky crap tasting grapefruit beers but due to my disgust after tasting it i spat it out in the bar persons face and fled the watering hole screaming "Be gone with you Beelzebub" before i could catch the name of the beer on the pump.

Anywhoooooo, a better music topic now than my last update.

Sian and i have been watching "The Umbrella Academy" on Netflix and i have to say what a weird and wonderful watch it is. Not only that but it has a amazing soundtrack.
So here for your listening and viewing pleasure are our favourites from the series.

Woodkid - "Run boy Run"


Morcheeba - "Blood like lemonade"


Noel Gallagher - "In the heat of the moment"


The Doors - "Soul Kitchen"


There's just a few to get on with but i would advise anyone if you got Netflix give The Umbrella Academy a go. It's a great watch. Also Tin Star on Sky, we're about to have a weekend of watching season 2, YAAAAHOOOOO!

Note: I am back on the ice again, got my new ice hockey boots and going early in morning before any brats, I'm mean wonderful children are on the ice taking up my space with penguin stabiliser's.
Look out Wayne Gretzky, Kevlar is back!

Serve All, Love All, Peace All, Kevlar Out!

Thursday, 28 March 2019

T Minus Countdown till the rock and other blabbering crap.

Well its a certain amount of days till my return to the rock.........can't be bothered to work it out but its less than 365 and more than 1.

Now, i say its rant time but its not really its more of things that annoy me. I don't get angry about things anymore as I've mellowed allot more than i was over the past 2 years so here i go anyway........

"It's rant time, everybody loves a rant time, all of us need a rant tiiiiiiiiiiime, IT'S RANT TIME!!!!"

1/ Mobile phone couples

So your a couple, you go out for a coffee, a drink, a meal, you sit down and before they've even ordered..... the phones come out from both and not a word is uttered between them for the whole day/night out.
Myself and Sian are amazed and find it so funny. We see it everywhere we go and almost every couple are doing it, perhaps we're the odd ones because we don't.
When we go out our phones are nowhere to be seen, in fact our phones are only ever looked at when we can be bothered, even in the house or we use them to find directions when we go out and about.
We love going out, being in each others company and chatting and having a laugh.
WHATS THE POINT IN GOING OUT JUST TO IGNORE EACH OTHER?
I use my phone that little that i get 200 MB of data a month and at the end of last month i still had 199 MB left. Question, where did that 1 MB go?


2/ Passwords

 So these days you need to join and add details and create a password just to find out the weather so i don't join anything that asks for all that rubbish but for buying and travel you need to add passwords.
You think of a password and type it in. You are asked to confirm it so you type it in again. Then in big red letters it tells you its not usable as you need a capital letter, a number, a symbol and at least 8 characters long.
AAAAAGGGHHHHHH! TELL ME AT BEGINNING NOT AFTER I'VE PUT IT ALL IN, IDIOTS!

3/ Estate agents

I've been house hunting for four months since i got back.
Had a cash buyer for my house in Swansea (Brilliant) as my mum wants to be back in Cardiff closer to family and me.
Now then........Estate agents are useless, honestly, one estate agent knew nothing about the area or even the house we viewed with her.
You give specifics and price range and then you get mail shots for houses worth £400,000 with 6 bedrooms and a drive with double garage.
2-3 BEDROOMS I SAID AND I DON'T DRIVE.
Pictures. They look great, rooms are light, rooms are huge and no problems. You get there and rooms are as dark as caves, they are the size of actual doll house rooms and mold is everywhere.
TAKE BLOODY NATURAL PICTURES AND SAVE US ALL THE TIME WE TAKE TO VIEW IT.
You enquire about a house for sale, no sign of offer pending, no sign of sold but when you call they tell you its one or the other but its still online.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I WANT TO SEE HOUSES THAT ARE AVAILABLE NOT HOW GOOD YOU ARE AT SELLING CAUSE YOU'VE SOLD EVERY HOUSE ON YOUR WEBSITE, MORONS!
Unfortunately didn't find anywhere so now on hold until i come back from Zakynthos.
Don't like estate agents at all. No wonder i bought privately last time.

4/ Reality TV and their Z listers

I do not watch any reality TV at all cause its not real life, its garbage. I saw a advert for "Made in Chelsea" there were a couple arguing and then a drink was thrown in the boyfriends face over what i don't care but lets see why it's not real shall we.
First there is a camera angle of both facing each other, then one just of female, then one just of male, that's 3 camera angles. This shows its obviously all staged and NOT reality.
Are you trying to tell me that just as they are arguing in real time that a producer quickly gets 3 cameras together, positions them perfectly on stands and catches it all?
To get those shots the dull, idiot Z listers would have to be stood on marks with perfect lighting and a director calling camera angles and the YUFF of today think its real and aspire to be like these brainless reality stars that are churned out week after week.
SHOW THE REAL LIFE OF EVERYDAY PEOPLE WORKING HARD TO SURVIVE NOT Z LISTERS HAVING MONEY THROWN AT THEM TO ACT BADLY!

5/ Rubbish sports

I watch allot of sport Rugby, Ice Hockey, Football, Boxing, and many others but some sports are just......... RUBBISH!
Where do i start.

OK Golf. You place a little white ball on a stick then hit it with another stick and walk after it and keep doing this until it goes in a hole. I think its more of a walk with a activity involved. It does take skill though.
I see it the same as me walking on one of my marathon walks, kicking a conker that has fallen off a tree until i get bored then passing it down into a drain, same thing but you can't class that as a sport.

Formula 1. Its someone driving fast, wearing out tyres and having Kwik Fit fitters on hand. For the spectators which pay through the nose to sit on a grass bank and see a flash of colour go past, HOW EXCITING! Every 1 MIN 25 SEC you get say YAY! for 1 second as they flash past you. It does take skill though.
I see it the same as a few mobility scooters going around a supermarket up and down the aisles taking those sharp bends at the deli counter but i see the scooters for longer and don't have to pay.
The only good thing about F1 is the start and that's just because there may be a collision after that its DULL, DULL, DULL!

Indoor bowls. This was on BBC2 not so long ago. If snails had a spectator sport this would be it.
Also if a Blue Rinse company had a advertising board there they'd make millions just from the spectators either side of the bowling green.
Can't call it a sport though.
By my old house there was a bowling green and after school i used to play as we got an hour each day for free and even i could hit the jack and get close to it so you don't even need skill if i can do it.

Test Cricket. Firstly any sport that takes 5 days to play out is a past time, not a sport. Secondly it can only be played in warm sunny climates which basically means the teams get a free holiday every time they play. The game itself starts with indecent behaviour with a person rubbing their groin with a red ball, then running 20 metres, throwing the ball as hard as they can with some spin only for another person to put a plank of wood up to stop it dead. BRILLIANT! STUNNING! WOW!
Do it again, do it again! So they do, repeat 10 times out of 12. Its the only sport i know that scores in the hundreds but can still end up a draw.

SPORT HAS TO BE EXCITING, THESE ARE NOT SPORTS!

Many people I'm sure hate the sports i like which is fine by me, we're all allowed an opinion but my sports aren't boring.

Feel much better now after that, I'm sure there was one more rant but can't remember what.....never mind, I'll remember for next time.

FOOD TIME!

I love melted cheese. Not so fussed on cheese without it being heated but warm melted cheese is so good. This led me to a eureka moment, how about a baked cheese and smokey bacon sandwich.
I began buy buying a bloomer bread and cutting it length ways so you only get 4 slices out of it.
Then you grill off 4 rashers of smokey bacon.
Place the 4 slices of bacon on one of the slices of bread and then cover with a mound of grated mozzarella.
Place on top of that another slice of the bloomer bread. cover the whole sandwich with a mound of grated mature cheese, some salt and pepper.
Wrap in foil tightly and place on a baking tray in a oven at Gas mark 6 / 160 fan assisted for 20 Min's.
After 20 Min's unwrap the sandwich and finish off under grill until golden brown.
Add sauce if preferred then stuff your face while it all drips down your chin and burns the roof of your mouth.

MMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm


WARNING: This is a heart attack on a plate.

MUSIC!

What has happened to the good old but naff party songs these days?
All the songs are so serious and dramatic and "woh is me" sounding. Aren't the modern generation of singers happy? They all sound so depressed when singing and the lyrics are just the same words repeated over and over.

Example, Rhianna her song "Work" here are the lyrics:-

Work, work, work, work, work, work
You see me I be work, work, work, work, work, work
You see me do me dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt
There's something 'bout that work, work, work, work, work, work
When you a gon' learn, learn, learn, learn, learn, learn
Me na care if me tired, tired, tired, tired, tired, tired  


GENIUS!

So for those singers who have forgotten how to have fun here are some awful, terrible party songs

This kept Ultravox - Vienna off the No.1 spot, TRAGIC!.



This was also a No.1.........HOW?



This is terrible, just terrible and another No.1.



See how simple we were, that simple we made this No.1



This didn't make it to No.1 only No.2, god help us all.



I am now close to shooting myself after all these awful but hugely popular songs and it doesn't get any better, another No.2 and i mean that in both senses.



And the worst of the worst which was No,1 in 10 countries, can you believe it. This is one rabbit that should have been put down.



And kids, all these songs were played relentlessly at nightclubs, parties, weddings etc 
On second thoughts.........stick to the boring depressing songs your writing now.

The rock is getting ever closer and there is no major changes this year to the bar as i did allot last season, was going to get some new sofas but my saying is "If the sofas ain't broke don't change 'em"
I have got a few ideas but these are just subtle changes.
The drinks menu has a few new cocktails I've created over the winter and i have added the ORIGINAL Porn Star Martini made exactly how the creator Douglas Ankrah makes it, so this is the correct and only way to make it.
My body is telling me i don't have to many seasons left in me because as I'm getting older the bar is getting busier but i would never employ a member of staff as its not how i want the bar to be also I'm a real tight ass so paying a wage would make me cry lol.
Not only that but my life in the UK is the best its been now with my personal life and don't want to spend to many more seasons away, i feel more settled now and more chilled here.
In saying all that i am back for my 13th season with Oceanic and my 19th season in all just in case the rumours are flying as usual that I'm not returning like they were in 2015, 2016, 2017 and 2018.
Amazing isn't it, when will these gossips learn lol.

And finally..........



I LOVE RUGBY, I LOVE OUR NATIONAL ANTHEM, I LOVE MY COUNTRY.
BOYS, YOU MADE US PROUD.

So until my final update from the UK before i leave..........

Serve All, Love All, Peace All, Kevlar Out!



Thursday, 7 March 2019

TRY AGAIN! Lost in the wilderness for 3 months, I'M BACK!

Firstly it's been a sad few days for the music industry with the loss of Keith Flint from The Prodigy and documentary/youth culture presenter Magenta Devine both of whom i have met in Cardiff when i was a DJ.
Back in the day bands used to travel around the nightclubs promoting their singles.
Keith i met in Ritzy/Astoria Nightclub in 1991 when The Prodigy were promoting their first single "Charly" and Magenta i met in Neros Nightclub in 1986 when she was with the band Sigue Sigue Sputnik.
You would get a few minutes with the bands to go through the schedule of the night. For that brief moment in time they were both really friendly nice people from completely opposite ends of the social scale.
Both pioneers in their on fields and brought so much to Music and youth culture that in these days there will be no one who will even come close to replacing them. Both will be missed.

Now then........this is now the third time I've tried to write this update. The first time as you all know i had a complete meltdown after deleting all my writing. The second time exactly the same thing happened after almost finishing it but i was nowhere near the delete button, so here goes a third time.

Because the last 2 updates were so long i think that may have been the problem for the page deleting so i will be leaving out "Rant Time" for this update.
 I write a stream of consciousness then go back and edit it so all 3 updates wouldn't have been the same. I hate trying to think of what to write as it never seems genuine it feels forced, so fingers crossed this time it won't disappear.

For 3 long months i have been in the wilderness with no playing with toys, no blood and urine samples, wandering lonely as cloud around Cardiff and just basically being bored till Sian comes home from work.

November - As part of my birthday present from Sian i was bought tickets to see Human League with Midge Ure as support. AWESOME!
Midge Ure was great and could still hit the high note in Vienna, shame the backdrop looked like a stage in a Valleys Working Men's Club. Can i say that these days? Am i being sexist? Sorry, Valleys Working Sheep's Club. It was just a black sheet with white lights shining down it.
Then out walked Phil, Susan and Joanne. They started off with "Sound of the Crowd" my favourite Human League song and finished with "Being Boiled" my second favourite Human League song. Actually they finished with "Together in electric dreams" but that wasn't Human League that was Phil with Georgio Moroder. It was amazing. Until you watch them you forget how many hits they've had. If they were playing again tomorrow I'd be there.

December - Christmas blah blah blah. It gets stretched out longer every year and for what......30 Min's on one day and its over, the only thing good that came out of Christmas was the present that Sian and i gave to each other.......A TRIP TO SWITZERLAND FOR NEW YEARS! Woohoo!

There is no such thing anymore as a last minute deal, book way in advance is the only way to save.
We booked this trip in March 2018. Return flights for 2, 3 nights in a hotel on the bank of lake Geneva in Montreux and train tickets from Geneva to Montreux and don't forget this is New Years in total cost us £450. It's cost me more than that just for a hotel in London for New Year and Montreux is a much better place.

Flight from Gatwick to Geneva 95 Min's, perfect.
Train ride along the whole length of lake Geneva is great, 69 Min's from airport to Montreux.
Straight to hotel and all checked in by 11.45am New Years Eve.

I've been here before so i knew my way around but this time the hotel was perfect and a amazing location on the bank of Lake Geneva.

View from our room.


so beautiful.


Mountains to left of us........


Hotels to the right and I'm........... stuck in a hotel with you.


Christmas tree was still up.


Freddie at Christmas.


I'm not in to wine bars, cafe bars and bistros they're OK for a special occasion but not for a good old drink, i like a good old bar. We had a walk around but didn't have to walk far, 5 Min's from hotel was the Barrel Oak.


Now any bar that has a real log fire lit and on the fire hood two of my favourite things Liverpool and Jack Daniels is damn fine place.


20 different draught beers at 8 CHF a pint, that's £6


Shaker cocktails the same size as the ones i serve 45 CHF, that's £36, i charge 5€. Maybe a price change lol.


The view from Barrel Oak dining area.


On to Veyvey which is the next town along from Montreux. I came here the last time but just a quick visit. This time did a bit more exploring.

The seahorse guardians of lake Geneva



That's one god damn big bauble.


Is this the last C&A store in existence?


This is the casino floor in Montreux. That floor area used to be 3 separate recording studios with the mixing studio on the opposite balcony. This was owned by Queen and the mixing studio is now where the Queen museum is in aid of Mercury Phoenix Trust. Artist such as David Bowie and AC/DC have recorded here.


And finally where else in the world would you find a vending machine on the pavement full and in working order.


I have to say that out of anywhere i have been in this world that Switzerland is my favourite place, it does feel like my spiritual home. Its peaceful, beautiful, relaxing just makes everything feel and it was sunny and warm again all the time we were there.

January - Apart from Switzerland another boredom filled month.

February - Like Christmas we decided for Valentines to just get a gift for us both so a Trip to London on Valentines weekend it was.
Once again, the early bird catches the worm. We booked this in June 2018, weekend in London with Hotel on St. James Park by Trafalgar Square and return coach in total £140. BOOM!

I've been to London so many times I've forgotten and i used to work and live in London for a year at Harrods, Selfridges and Max Bygraves luxury apartment in Victoria, that was a bit obscure i know.
So there isn't much of London i haven't seen.

We took a lovely stroll through Hyde Park and came across a statue i had never seen before. Its huge! I mean the statue. Its a war memorial with the figure of Achilles and his famous special armour that everyone knew him by. It was a amazing sight to see. I mean the statue.


We aren't in to going places where you go to be seen or brag about we go to places that are interesting. We found a doorway that was a Sushi bar called Ichi Riki. You walk down stairs and go in to a basement that has only 24 seats. It just looked like a cafe. The menu was vast and we didn't really know what to order as so much choice so we just ordered a load. Best sushi ever.


Only part of what we ordered and great value.


Time for a drink and just across the road was a good old pub called Grafton Arms.


As we were sat there i noticed pictures of Harry Seacombe, Peter Sellers and Spike Milligan dotted around the walls. Then i found out that The Goons used to write their sketches in a room above the pub and Spike use to work behind the bar sometimes.


A trip London is never London without feeding the Squizzels in St. James Park (that's the main reason i got the hotel there). We fed loads of Squizzels but just as Sian was crushing nuts out of their shells a Blue Tit flew on to her hand sat and took a nut. Sian decided to hold her hand out and up and these birds starting flying in (Not pigeons, yuk). They were Blue Tits and Grey Tits then a Robin and finally a Parakeet. There were 5 Parakeets on the trees around us by the time we left.

Ring-necked Parakeet


A Robin


It was like scene from Snow White all Sian had to do was sing "A song and a smile".
Birds feeding from her hand, Squizzels at her feet and Gooses pecking at her bum.
At one point there was a Squizzel sat right by her feet looking up at Sian sorting saying "Oi! Look down here. Where's my nuts?!

Siany's takin' us to the London zoo tomorrow,
Zoo tomorrow, zoo tomorrow
Siany's takin' us to the London zoo tomorrow
And we can stay all day


PINGUS!

Said in a Michael Caine voice "Pingus, bloody millions of em!"


LIFELESS MONKEYS!


BORING LIONESS'S!


STUPID SLEEPING LION!


JEBUS THE DONKEY!



SLOTH!


GEOFFRIES!


SQUIZZELS!

Squizzel with his nut box. Be funnier if it was a sack.


And finally for my good friend Tasos a whiskey shop.


Now you know me, I'm a big fan of the arts. I go to museums, I've been to a few operas, i paint a little, i sometimes dabble in poetry. Its time to see my first Am Dram.
Not holding out much hope if I'm being honest.
We got to the place where the performance was and it was "Musicals through the ages from stage & screen".
Now in my mind i would be sat in a school hall with a stage, with curtains and changeable backdrops.
NOPE! My living room on Zakynthos was bigger than this room and the stage was no bigger than a good sized dining table.
OK, Kev be open minded forget the room size.

I better get a drink, GOD DAMN IT! Only wine or lager, i drink neither, now i have nothing to numb my senses.

The first song "The Wizard of Oz". I was bursting to laugh and they hadn't even started singing but i sucked it up and stayed rock steady. The start was OK, i think nerves were there.


As the show went on it actually wasn't that bad at all, we had songs from Grease, We Will Rock You, Joseph and his amazing techni dreamcoat, Cabaret etc etc. The singing got better and better and that was without aid of a alcohol anesthetic.

Joseph and his coat. Well there wasn't a coat which i think there should of been as its not called Joseph and his Technicolor t-shirts.


And here are Pink, Christina Aguilera and Mia singing Lady Marmalade when they reach 60.


All said they did a great show with the very limited space. I will throw my name in to the mix if ever you do The Greatest Showman, me as the lead of course as i have the voice and choreography experience. My part as "The Singing sheep" in Joseph and his amazing technicolor dreamcoat when i was 11 at Sophia Gardens brought rave reviews in Variety Magazine and my solo of "Once in Royal David's City" at LLandaff Cathedral didn't leave a dry seat in the house........I mean eye....dry eye.

Now my one real pet hate is bad signage, advertising or signs that make no sense.

Here is the first idiotic advert.


"Vegan Fish Fillets" WHAT? If its vegan it won't have fish in it anyway so they would just be "Vegan Fillets".No need to have fish anywhere in the advert. IDIOTS!


"Pub of the year 2012" we are now in 2019, that means you've been less than great for 7 years, WHY WOULD YOU!


And finally, the lowest of the low, a sign that has no sense at all. A sandwich delivery service that's tag line is "Who you gonna call?". OK that's fine but to then add the Ghostbusters logo is ridiculous. WHAT THE HELL DOES A GHOST HAVE TO DO WITH A BREAD RELATED SNACK?


I saw a lady going in to her workplace wearing "Active wear" and before anyone says "She may be going straight from gym" she wasn't. She had make up on, wasn't sweaty and her hair was hairspray perfect. So then i thought to myself the next time i get a job i will wear my Pyjamas and dressing gown to work as i find them comfortable if women can wear active wear.
Then to my amazement that same day in Swansea City centre i saw a guy, i am not lying, this is real and i took the pic.


How spooky is that.

And finally, RUGBY!

We overcame France, We struggled against Italy BUT......We dominated England's predictable kicking game.



I've been to the Principality many times to watch Wales versus All Blacks, France, Ireland, South Africa, Australia, Tonga and Japan also i managed there but when i go to watch England its never enjoyable like the others.
To much rides on that game and nerves are shot whenever I've been to watch it. Tension is high, you don't get that party friendly atmosphere and both England and Wales are bad losers when they play each other. In saying all that ......WE WON! IN YOUR FACE CHARIOT LOVERS!

WALES, WALES, WALES!


And on to the World Cup. I know the 6 nations isn't over yet but I'm realistic and give ourselves little chance of beating Ireland. They are a dangerous team.


Well, no deleting this time thank god. Not long now until I'm back on the rock. Flight out is 1st May and bar needs nothing doing to it, just a clean up and I'm open.

So until my next update........

Serve All, Love All, Peace All.......Kevlar Out!