Wednesday, 19 October 2011

Time ladies and gentleman please!

So that's it, another season over after tonight. That's now 11 seasons on the island and 5 seasons with Oceanic and every year has just got better.

Almost out of stock now and this has been my busiest Oct by far. Was still full up till Monday night and 19 of my customers go home tomorrow so pointless staying open and getting more stock just in case a few more turn up but the nights are freezing now and got the outdoor heaters on full blast, never felt it this cold.

So last Tuesday i decided to take my friends Janice and Phil (dedicated customers since i opened in 2007) out for lunch but there was some crossed wires. I was taking them to a locals taverna just outside of Zakynthos town called "The Green Boat". I explained where it was to Janice and Phil and they sort of knew where it was. The story continues like this.

Later on the day of our lunch i get a text saying "Booked a table for 3 at Porto Fino". Now this place i only knew as a cocktail bar that in season the Greeks visit so i thought they were joking. On meeting Janice and Phil i find out that its true so off we headed to Porto Fino as "The Green Boat" was closed for the season. On arrival it was the cocktail bar i thought it was and the woman who ran it was in town getting our food. At this point it clicked that they didn't have a restaurant menu and only served 8 bar snacks which i read on the cocktail menu. Phil when he booked the table had asked were they open for food and the woman said yes so Phil ordered a variety of starters which is what i eat at The Green Boat. On her return we ordered drinks, 2 orange juices and a bottle of Amstel. Out come the drinks, small bottle of Amstel and 2 mixed fruit smoothies, not a good start. She then brings us 3 Greek salads which were lovely but its not rocket science putting together a Greek Salad and we only wanted one to share. Half way through eating our salad we were brought a plate each of the same food and all 3 plates had the same things on them. Now this was the most bizarre plate of food I've ever had in my life. It looked like she had gone to her house fridge and done a Ready, Steady, Cook with what was left in it. The plate had exactly this on it:- A base of stale bread soaked in olive oil and oregano to mask the fact it was stale, topped with warm soggy chips, one whole artichoke cut in half and grilled to death so much so if i had tried to eat it I'm sure i would have pierced my cheeks, 3 x okra, yuk, 4 x tinned sardines, 4 x slices of burnt aubergine, 2 x green olives, 2 x slices of village sausage not halves, slices, and to top it all off 1 x dried out packet meatball. This was our meal. It wasn't the worst meal I've had on the island but it was in the bottom two LOL. Then on the house we had one small plate of small vine grapes which had more seeds than flesh. Poor Phil, but it wasn't his fault it was just a misunderstanding on which restaurant it was. So it was time for the bill which Janice and Phil so kindly offered to pay. Phil summoned the lady to the table for the bill. I had worked out at cost price at the most the whole meal with drinks would cost about 12 euro so should be about 36 euro as there was no price as no food menu. How much do you reckon? 36? No, 46? No, must be 56? No, OK surely 66? No, has to be 76? No, the total cost for that meal with the 2 drinks that were wrong don't forget was 88 euro. WHAT THE F@*! Phil went quite pale and buckled at the knees LOL He gave her 90 and she walked away waving saying "have a nice holiday". So she wasn't even going to give him the 2 euro change. So the morale of this story is "Never book a table without checking the prices and if they actually have a menu" haha.

Greek Salad was all fine.
Main course was from out of a Stephen King book, bizarre and weird LOL.

And free dessert was from outside the house haha.

Total Wipeout, Am I or Aren't I?

So i'm just about to tidy around the apartment, pack my bag and make everything secure for the winter. So as in previous post the next update will be my seasons review and other crappy chit chat i had forgot through the season. So until i'm back in the wet, grey and windy UK its goodbye from Zakynthos.

No comments:

Post a Comment