Wednesday, 27 January 2010

Its to bloody cold!

How come its so cold if the headline is "Global Warming"?

I've just been for a walk along Swansea beach and it was lovely but as soon as i stepped inland it was freezing, i got in to my house and my dog decided to curl up and pull her blanket over herself, a penguin was fishing in my bath and a polar bear was sat in front of my living room fire with my slippers on its that cold in this house LOL.

So what have i been up to this past 2 weeks, well, i've been developing my menu for next season which i think is going to be a winner. As my lovely customers know i don't go for the same old same old cocktails like all the other bars, i have 6 of the most popular and then all the rest are unique to Oceanic as they are cocktails i have devised, this year i've taken them a step further with incorperating fresh fruit blended in to the new cocktails i've come up with. Can't give to much away as big brother is watching us haha! Lets just say if you thought my Black Forest Gateuax cocktail and Lemon Cheesecake cocktail tasted good these will blow your mind and taste buds.

Out of the blue i had a phone call from a gentleman called Won Phat Cow telling me he had been reading my blog and saw my tripadvisor reviews and thought i was just the man for the job to turn his bars fortunes around in his restaurant. Of course i was very flattered as he was calling from China, he said i could go over to see what i thought of his bar in his restaurant and see what i could do. I thought no problem, i can see it now "Kevlars Bar Nightmares", me going all around the world turning bars around to be a success, yes i'll do it and this would be the start. So i packed my bag and off i went. After getting there i was met by Mr. Cow and i wondered why he wouldn't tell me the name of his restaurant for me to do some research but then when we got to the restaurant i could see why.
A nice cable car trip first, lovely views. All i could think of was James Bond and his enemy Jaws, hope Mr. Cow doesn't have a bodyguard called OddJob
I know i've lost a stone in weight but how skinny do i have to be to walk along these foot planks, so i continued on.
By this point i had lost another stone in weight,i think you can guess how, the lady in this pic was so slow i had to pass her but told her to stand still so i could take a pic.
At this point i decided to take a rest, pulled out me Thermos, had a brew and a HobNob and continued on my merry way.
The woman i passed on the foot planks was catching up on me and telling me in an angry manner to "hurry up", at this point i turned around and took a picture of her climbing the footholes and chains, just after i took this pic curisoity got the better of me and i unlocked one of the locks on the chain, OOPS! now who will i take pics of? She was moaning about her feet hurting anyway so she's got down quicker now, see, always a positive out of a negative.
Just a few more steps to go, hope theres a toilet at this place as i ain't going all the way back down for a pee, i'm busting to go.
Is that it? After all that climbing its a wooden Wetherspoons and like all Wetherspoons sat in the corner was the local alcoholic necking the 99p pint of bitter.

After long thought i came up with an idea on how to improve the business, the worlds largest escalator, job done! LOL
NOTE:- This is a real place you can visit, its a temple in china but some say its a restaurant that if you reach it without falling to your death the food is free, not a very good business plan, your customers either die or get away without paying LOL

No comments:

Post a Comment