Monday 28 July 2014

OCEANIC, SEASON 8, EPISODE 8 "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?"

Good morning, good morning, the sunshine is shinning bright, good morning, good morning, to you and you and you and you.

July is almost over and very unexpectedly it is now my best July. Very nice surprise indeed. Each night has been different, could never predict how the nights were going to turn out, sometimes empty early and busy late, next night busy early and busy late, other nights busy early and quiet late but always a busy time at some point. The nights are pretty consistent in May, June, Sept and Oct but July and Aug aaggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh!

This week i had an experience that i haven't had for a loooooonnngggggg time. A group of 4 came in i would say aged between 20 to 25. They seemed to make themselves quite comfortable quite quickly. I approached them the same as anyone else who visits the bar and gave them the usual chat about the drinks. One told me to make them whatever as long as it was strong, the other asked is it the real stuff in the drinks, one told me what they wanted in their cocktail and the other was very pleasant and ordered a banoffee pie cocktail. All drinks were made and delivered to table along with the bill which in all came to 16€. They were a bit loud but not bothering anyone so just left them to it in the corner, if they had disturbed my customers i would have told them to calm it down but it didn't get to that. Then came the time to pay the bill. I had already clicked that they were workers, from where i didn't know so i asked them where they were staying and were they enjoying their holiday, the reply came "We work in Laganas and got a night off", my worker radar did not fail me.
They polished off all their drinks with not a drop left in the glasses. I could see they were looking strangely at the bill so i approached the table.

Me:- "Is everything alright?"
Strong cocktail guy:- "Is this right 16€?"
Me:- "Yes, 5 for my strongest cocktail which has 7 measures in it, 4 for the Banoffee Pie and 3.50 each for the other 2 cocktails"
Girl with her own cocktail:- "We work here!"
Me:- "Yes i know and well done for finding jobs in such a bad economic climate" (Think this bit of sarcasm went over their heads)
Strongest cocktail guy:- "Yeah but we work here do we get a workers discount?"
Me:- "No unfortunately, i only give discount in November" (Straight over their heads again)
Girl with her own cocktail:- "So we're paying the full price?"
Me:- "Yes, like any other of my customers"

That's where the conversation finished, coins got counted out, they up and left without even a goodbye just a dirty look.
It was like that "Do you know who i am?" moment.
Now i may be wrong but I'm sure the last time i looked my bar is called "Oceanic" not "Charity".
I've never ever asked for discount anywhere in 14 years on this island and in fact i always leave more than the drink costs out of respect for the owner of the business.
Ah well, doubt I'll see them again, never mind.

Minion Kevin, to the bike.
Yes its road trip time with my little buddy.


No Kevin that's my helmet get your own.

We decided to head off to the west coast for our first road trip to show him the sights.
I told him we would most probably stop for a swim somewhere. Kevin wanted a rubber ring and popped to shop to purchase one. He came back with a doughnut which he swore blind was sold to him by the shop owner as a rubber ring that looked like a doughnut. I told him no its definitely a doughnut but Kevin argued blind it was a rubber ring.


MUNCH! NOM! See, told you. Kevin was not amused.


Before we headed out West we stopped for my morning frappe, Kevin followed suit, BIG MISTAKE which i would find out later in the day.


Firstly i took Kevin to the largest Greek flag at Keri. I've been here 3 times to see it and this was the first time it was flying. I had been told it was the size of a football pitch, RUBBISH! At the most its the size of a very small 5 a-side pitch. Kevin wasn't impressed.


We decided to have a little break from the bike at this point and have another frappe at Keri Lighthouse Taverna. I forgot about what a rip off it was here, 4 euro for a frappe. Kevin joked was it made with one of those coffee beans that gets pooped out by a monkey. The waitress wasn't amused.


Here's me and Kevin having a laugh about tourists wearing budgie smugglers with sandals and socks, so not a good look but lots of them walking about the old road.


This is a restaurant called La Bruschetta near Keri beach on the way to the Lighthouse. I went here about 10 years ago and its still open which is great to see being as its quite far out in the sticks. Its most probably the best pasta restaurant I've eaten at on the island. I had Ravioli with an apricot and mince meat filling. It tasted amazing and it was freshly made pasta, not bought in. Shame it opens at 6.30pm, it seems i will never get to eat here again.


The view of Keri from La Bruschetta.


On our travels we passed by many places of interest for Kevin to browse over and here is the Monastery of Eleftherotria. Kevin asked if there were monks and nuns inside. I'm not really sure, I've never seen any. Kevin thought the monastery was made out of Lego, idiot!


Kevin made me stop so he could have his pic taken here, Nothing much to see, just a nice view. He's such a tourist.


Kevin liked the cross at Kampi. With me being a Reverend Kevin enquired why such a symbol as the cross which gave so much pain to Jebus was used as a symbol of the church. He was wondering why the symbol wasn't the star that led the wise men to Jebus or a donkey that carried Mary to Bethlehem, you know a nice symbol that's linked to Jebus. To this question i pondered for a moment and with all my Reverend wisdom i replied "Pass!"


I showed Kevin the Mycenaean tombs at Kampi. He promptly climbed in and thought the tombs were very spacious. How disrespectful of the dead, naughty Kevin.


As we carried on from Kampi we stopped off at the 5* all inclusive Grand Mabely hotel. I didn't presume we could use the pool so left our towels on the bike. I approached reception and asked if it was ok to come in for a coffee. The receptionist said yes that's fine and if i wanted to use the pool it was 10€. 10€! We weren't that desperate for a swim. We went in and ordered some coffee, that's 3 frappe's Kevin's had now.
Lovely hotel, very plush, but it was like a ghost hotel and its now July. Hardly anyone there. Also you could see that trade wasn't good as standards had slipped and furniture was stained and a bit tired, not what you'd expect in a 5* hotel, 4* more like now but not 5*.

Kevin at the empty pool that we had to pay 10€ to use which we didn't. Only 6 people at pool.


Very plush, but the sofa that Kevin is on had a huge drink stain on seating cushion, not a good look for  a 5* hotel.


For some strange reason there are 4 elephants outside the hotel. Why, i don't know but Kevin decided to go for a ride on one. Its a statue you cretin!


It was getting rather warm and having not had a swim i took Kevin off to the Ilaria Hotel. We set up our sunbeds and just chilled. Kevin wanted to be golden bronzed instead of golden yellow. I made sure he put factor 15 on to be safe.

 Minion Kevin even has the same taste in pool side drinks as me, Lemon Ice Tea. mmmmmmmmmmm!


The Ilaria Hotel Pool, beautiful, cold, huge, relaxing and no one there, well, there were 5 others. Such a shame.


As the day wore on the 3 coffees Kevin had drank kicked in and he became a hyper nightmare. Constantly blabbering on about all and nonsense, fidgeting on bike and basically doing my bloody head in. It actually got to the point where i screamed and told him to get off the bike, I've had enough you complete ass. I made him hitchhike the rest of the way home as Sunday is my only day of rest and he was making me stressed, so i had a lovely peaceful final leg of our road trip home. Get thumbing buddy.

Kevin the Minion giving me the middle finger as i drove off.


Due to Kevin having to find his own way home i didn't make him check out the mad axemans home but today as i rode in to town i popped and had a quick peek, OH MY GOD. The door was open. I quickly jumped back on the bike and hit the gas, my heart was thumping out my chest. Little Kevin is definitely going in before me when i send him there. Stay tuned for next weeks update, will Kevin make it back in one piece? Will there be a battle of epic proportion, Good V's Evil? And will that trainer attached to the body in the ground fit me? All will be revealed next week.

 Kevin the minion getting fouled, i was never like that when playing football


So until then my lovely, wonderful, super, amazing blog followers i shall bid the farewell.

Serve All, Love All. Peace All, Kevlar Out!

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