And how the devil are we? Are you all well? Yes I know, its raining, cold and grey and we all can't wait till its Zakynthos time.
Just a quick add on to my last post before I start the update, this advertising poster was still up in Costa Coffees (other coffee shops are available) window, 7 days after Halloween. Drives me mad when an event has passed and businesses leave advertising which is out of date.
Well the winter so far has been going swimmingly don't you know. Been getting out whenever I can to go to Swansea, out for walks, and out to go food shopping, mmmmmmmmm love food shopping, Co op's shares must go down when I go back to Zakynthos LOL. I also enjoy my days out to Swansea and having a walk around, chillin out in Costa's with my caramel latte and granary toast while I read in the daily rags reporting which z list celebrity has snogged another z list celebrity. Winter is also a terrible time for me due to the fact its "crap factor" and "strictly come boredom" time. Why are these programmes still going? Not that I watch much TV but talk about dragging it out, do they both have to use up 2 nights of valuable air time?
On my way back home from Swansea there is a column with the writing of Dylan Thomas on it, I think he was writing it about me LOL.
Also on TV at the moment is Masterchef: The Professionals, now as you know my crumpet range is second to none and all the famous TV chefs and Jamie Oliver are shaking in their boots at the thought of me opening my chain of Crumpet Creation eateries but just to show you once again I'm not a one trick pony and can mix it with the big boys I made a Parsnip, Sweet potato and Apple soup with honey, a side of a flat bread with sun dried tomatoes, garlic and herbs and for dessert mini meringues with a mango filling and a fig & Mandarin sauce. How posh am I?
Well I'm now back in my 4th home Simbec. This medical study was on a knife edge if I was going to be on it or not. Took my pre-medical, blood tests were fine, BMI was perfect, urine sample fine, lung test was perfect, ECG test for blood pressure and heart rate was fully fit but my test for TB came back borderline. A re-take of blood test for TB was taken and it came back negative the second time, Phew, must stop hanging around with that badger family LOL.
This study is 42 days in house and 7 return out-patient visits. Walk in the park (NOTE:- The study is not me walking in a park, I mean that's how easy it will be). The staff here do make the stay allot easier, always helpful and friendly, also they always seem to be extremely happy, must be all the drugs they're around.
For the first 3 days I was wired up to so many machines, one of the machines when turned on sounds like the theme from "Magic Roundabout". Had a blood pressure unit on for 24hrs that took readings every half hour during day and every hour through the night, Vital signs tracker on 24hrs a day, telemetry unit plugged in for 12hrs a day and 5 times a day another blood pressure unit attached along with another ECG unit, these are attached just to take readings at certain times of the day and then taken straight back off again. the good thing about doing these studies is that I get a body M.O.T. every year. You'd pay a fortune to have it done privately.
Once all these units are attached I am winched up to the roof where I am left until a storm comes and then a lightning conductor waits for just one bolt of lightning to strike and bring me back to life after which I become, IMMORTAL!
No, sorry that's Frankenstein isn't it? Not me. My apologies.
Once all these units are attached I am lowered in to a water bath where my skeletal system is reinforced with adamantium, I will then burst out of the water chamber and seek vengeance on all those who have crossed me as I have become, IMMORTAL!
Hang on, sorry, got it wrong again haven't I, that's Wolverine isn't it? Not me, oops, my apologies once again.
Once all these units are attached they take all the readings and see if there are any changes between before and after the drug is administered. The first 3 days are a bit manic having all the wires attached all day but now we are in to day 5 and its just vital sign readings taken 5 times a day and the rest is just relaxing. Not my favourite thing to do if i'm being honest but its all for a good cause so I can handle it. Its a Jeremy Kyle guests lifetime dream to lay in bed all day, watching TV and getting paid for it LOL.
The food here is also sooooo good but having to eat 4 times a day between 11am and 9pm every day is a real struggle for me as I only have 1 meal a day usually with some toast in the morning, that's it.
We have at 11am cereal and toast , 1pm a baguette of our choice, crisps and piece of fruit, 5pm a choice of main meal and dessert for example Chicken Korma rice and chips with sticky toffee pudding and custard for after, then at 9pm we have a wide choice of snacks including pies, pasty or sausage roll. So as you can see we're well looked after and the canteen staff again are always very helpful and happy. This place must be the happiest place in the world, its like Disney land with drugs LOL.
So as I said we are on day 5, think my release date is Christmas eve. Wow, just thought, its been a long time since I've heard those words "Release date" ha ha.
Here is a pic of me when I'm fully wired up, I had to draw in the leads that come off the blue pads on my body as i couldn't take a pic when they were attached but that is exactly what I had to wear for 3 days..
Its Movember, so I have joined in with this honourable month and have been growing my moustache for 5 days so far, I was going to post a pic of it but thought I would wait till my final day and take a pic before I shave it off, by then it should be a lovely bushy looking thing but its already starting to annoy me when eating so will be glad when I can shave it off. I've gone for a Hulk Hogan, no, Paul senior from Orange County Choppers, no no, even better, a James Hetfield from Metallica moustache, ah yes, that's it, forget all the others, the ultimate moustache, Derek Smalls from Spinal Tap.
My moustache idols LOL.
We shall see if I can match my moustache idols LOL.
One thing I forgot to say in the last update about the bar was it is no longer up for sale, I did have a few enquiries this season from people about buying it but as I said, I'm staying put and upgrading it.
Well my fine friends and lovely customers, its time to say farewell for now as I'm about to be strapped to a metal sprung bed and electrocuted till I talk, nope, sorry, that's John Rambo from First Blood Part 2 isn't it? Sorry, keep getting it wrong. I mean I'm about to be plugged in to check my vital signs, my mistake and then lunch time.
So until a fortnights time for the next thrilling, rip roaring instalment of my blog,
Serve All, Love All, Peace All, Kevlar out!
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