Its cloudy, thats it, everyone start moaning LOL

Well being as its a cloudy day today i've decided to do my update as i've been doing alot of thinking. Not in the way that Einstein or Stephen Hawking may think, not in the way Lord Alan Sugar may think, not even in the way Winnie the Pooh may think more along the lines of "How come belly button fluff is always a shade of grey but i've been wearing a red top", you can see how deep i think can't you.

I know exactly what questions i'm going to be asked in the bar tonight as its been cloudy, " Do you usually get clouds this time of year?", "Is it going to rain?" and "Do you know if its going to be cloudy tomorrow?" Do i look like Micheal Fish or John Kettley LOL.

Not much to report on the bar front, had 3 more lock out nights Friday, Sunday and Yesterday so its all Gravy! Banoffee Pie cocktail is selling through the roof just a shame its the longest cocktail to prepare and a bloody nightmare when 3 tables order it at the same time, wish i was an octopuss, with hands of course, tentacles in a bar situation, good or a bad thing? let me sleep on that one.

Chocolates, now i love a bit of chocolate but i was thinking the other day (heres where my thinking started) are the bars of chocolate being made smaller these days or is it cause i've grown? Ok granted i haven't grown much but i have grown. I can remember as if it was only yesterday i would sit in a restaurant for food and my feet would swing back and forth while i sat on the seat as my feet couldn't touch the floor. Hang on that was yesterday. Anyway as i was saying, i started thinking about the size of chocolate bars as someone asked me to make a curly wurly cocktail, that was easy but didn't they used to be the size of small ladder and now their the size of a large Snickers (formally known as Marathon) Can you still get Walnut Whips? If you bring me one over milk chocolate ones prefered LOL.

Taxis are still on strike, 5 days now but i really don't blame them, thousands of drivers made investments in their cars and licencenses from 150,000 to 200,00€ and then the gouverment then say you can get a licence for 2-3000€ leaving all those drivers who thought they were buying investments for the future with nothing, ridiculous! The tour companies are having a field day selling off their empty seats on coaches for 15€ one way per person, nothing like a tour company to prey on peoples misery to make a fat profit is there.

18-30's are starting to thin out now it seems but they did stay here 2 weeks longer than normal so lets hope it doesn't extend anymore over the years would hate to see this resort turn in to a mini Laganas which i'm sure it won't as its not really set up for that with so many restaurants and very few bars.

I have now eaten 2 baseball bats of white pudding and starting on a third. There are only so many things you can make with white pudding, had it with gravy, with boiled egg in sandwiches, with beans, on its own, eaten it cold uncooked, had it with tuna, basically with everything i have in my fridge and cupboard, by the time this seasons over i'll be having nightmares about white pudding. If ever there is a Masterchef series that wants cooks with specialized food, i'll be the man for white pudding haha!

This season is almost half way through and its been an amazing one already, ok very tough going and feel really drained what with it being manic this season as its only me that works the bar but still enjoyed it as met lots of new people and all have been wonderful, also its great to welcome back old friends and customers who have returned after a few years away. Many this year have come in due to this blog which i'm flattered by as if you've read my dribbling loon rambles and still want to drink in Oceanic then your a braver person than me LOL.

I have been approached by a well known director in hollywood to make a film of my life on Zakynthos based on the autobiography i'm writting called "A simple mans life". Well, i didn't know what to say, so we got down to some negotiations. First of all i wanted all brand rights to my catchphrases for T-shirts such as the classic from the Tropicana Centre when i did Quizgo which was a quiz with bingo mixed and my catchphrase was "Who wants to jiggle my balls?" meaning the bingo balls in the bag. They agreed. Then i wanted a life time supply of Frosted Shreddies (The King of Cereals). They agreed. But then we came upon a stumbling block, who would play me. They wanted Ewan Mcgregor but i wasn't going to budge on my choice, Ronnie Corbett. They said no. They were sticking with Ewan, i didn't care how many millions they were offering me its Ronnie Corbett or the deals off. The deals off. So i'm now in talks with Bidup TV to release it straight to DVD with total selling rights for the channel.

Sad news about Amy Winehouse this week but its not as if anyone could say "Didn't see that coming!" I prefered her when she won the Mercury music prize in 2004 but drugs and drink will get you in the end.

Been asked by many customers this year for CD's of the music i play in the bar which is great as it shows i'm playing the right type of music if they want copies of it. I don't sell it to them i'm happy to just give them a copy if its making them happy then i'm happy and whats a blank cd cost 50c if that, so its no big deal. Just have to remember to take out Rage Against the Machine - "Killing in the name" don't think the age group of my customers want to listen to the F word repeated over and over on sunday morning while having breakfast LOL.

Well time to clip my toenails, trim my thinning hair and have a soak in the tub, hope you enjoyed my little update i may start to do them as audio update as well for the visually impared like myself as my eyes are getting so bad i'm actually typing this via an old speak and spell toy with the voice of Stephen Hawking (not to be mixed up with Justin Hawking from the rock band The Darkness) or did Stephen Hawking steal the voice from the speak and spell? See i'm thinking again LOL.